Taking a break from studying. I am near the end of my first semester of the nursing program. There have been moments where I felt that I was Done With This Bullshit, mostly related to instructors who are probably better nurses than teachers.
Anyway…I am a 35 yr old man (still blows my mind). I have spent the last 15 years either in a band or as a bike messenger, both of which I am good at… but messengering only goes so far, and music has a fragile chemistry. At some point it became apparent to me that I wanted/needed to do Something Else- but it had to be something that I could respect myself for, which meant not going to school to learn how to tuck in my shirt and be a desk jockey- I saw enough of what that did to people younger than myself in my days as a messenger. I wanted something useful, and something empowering so that if the shit hit the fan I would keep cool and be a part of making it better. I went back to school and enrolled in the courses for people who haven’t been to school for a while. While shaking off the dust I met a number of people (mostly women) going for nursing. After some talking I thought ‘this fits’. –So, I am Going For It, and have been for 2 yrs. Only 1 1/2 to go.
My point in writing… it is discouraging to come across so much dissatisfaction! I am thankful for those of you who try to turn it around and remind a sinking person that their race isn’t run yet. Those of you who have been around and have the MO of ‘grimace and bear it’ scare me as much as those who are bailing out.
I don’t blame anyone for their feelings… I haven’t even got a clue what it is really like. But seriously, folks… am I just going to be miserable because of administrative issues and attitudes of the staff I work with?
Yes, Of course I must decide for myself how well I perform in this environment. Nevertheless, I keep feeling like I am trying to overcome thoughts about the next 5 years of my life being all rain and uphill pedaling

It's been a month since the last time I even looked at this.  

School has been kicking my ass.  I tell ya hwat (not misspelled), I wish that I was better at this.  My house is trashed.  My bikes need some love.  Songs are half written.  I haven't cooked anything but maintenance meals for 2 months.  

I can't wait until December 12th.

There have been a few good parts to the last few months:

-Got a Townes Van Zandt reissue of his self titled album, walked to the Blue Moon Diner, had beer, heard the A side of the record, then Jim Waive played and acoustic set.

-Got a still sealed copy of Lookout records PUNK USA album (Screeching Weasel, Jawbreaker, Vindictives) and rocked it out.

-New winter rain gear.

-MASS SABBATH, the Worlds Largest Black Sabbath Tribute Band, rocked the IX building here in Charlottesville to the benefit of the Charlottesville Derby Dames.  I was Ozzy.

-Acquired a 'harness' or whatever you call it to play harmonica and guitar at the same time.  Man, is that fun!  I'm no harp player, but it makes up for not having other musicians around.

-Got my picture in the paper for drinking beer.  While at the Blue Mountain Brewery with a good friend, a photographer was there who snapped a few shots of us with our beer samplers.  My tongue is hanging out of my mouth like I am concentrating really hard.

-My sister graduated the nursing program in Houston and is now employed.  Woohoo!!

-Got my ass whooped at a cyclocross race at the IX building.

There have been other good moments, but I can't really remember what I did yesterday due to the fast pace of the nursing program.  Last week is 3 wks ago in nursing student years.  

I will be going home to Htown in a month or so.  Gonna get some spring rolls and some Saint Arnold's beer.  And sleep on the couch at whoever's house.

Well, that's it for now.  Oh, I didnt win, or even make the final, in the songwriting contest I mentioned earlier.  I still like the song, though.  "Build Your Own 6 Pack''.  How could that not win?